Do you remember the birthday card you and Ben gave me 2 years ago? In it you wrote that I was the most pragmatic person you had ever met, and for that you loved me and trusted in me so much. That was the most beautiful birthday card I had ever received from anyone. I think back on the days we've had and I never fail to feel something warm inside me grow. Those frantic 'turning Florence's shed into an art-house' weeks, those night drives (though seldom) which bring us to the Jon Thia's neighbourhood, those BH park visits (and one in particular where we sat in the playground still innocent and sweet), those movie dates, those 3 am delirious moments where hysterical laughter just breaks out followed by some crazy-ass dances, and those times we woke up having to peel ourselves off each other. I admit that these beautiful moments we've shared aren't too many really, compared to some couples out there, and I know how much further I am from the guy you always expected to end up with.
Arguments have been breaking out between us from time to time, but I also know that arguments can be healthy if we both learn from it, and we have. I see how much you have learnt, especially the past few weeks, and I feel so proud. So proud that you have risen to where you are right now after experiencing such dark times, and finally loving yourself the way you deserve to be loved.
I love you Debbie. I love you because of the man you make me feel like. I love you because of how you show me care and affection like no one else has ever done. I love you because of the countless things you teach me. I love you because my heart breaks when I see you cry. I love you because of your honesty. I love you for your Eskimo kisses. I love you because I feel alive with you. I love you because you leave me facebook comments while we're talking face to face. I love you for your cuteness and your sincerity. I love you because of the way you call me 'bibi' in the mornings. I love the way you slowly open your eyes and let out the slightest, sweetest smile when you wake up. I love the way you get your hair in my face while you sleep, and quickly let out a 'hehe' while you bunch them up. I love the way you get slightly embarrassed while I act like a retard around K-mart. I love the way you can't wait for me to get home while I'm at work. I love how your gorgeous eyes sparkle. I love you because I can't help but smile at random times of the day, even on the balcony when I'm alone. I love you Debbie because it is you I want to take care of, and it is you I know I will always be there for, no matter what.
I've only read a couple of E.E.Cummings poems, but this one I remember clearly, and I think it best fits what I feel :)
I carry your heart with me (I carry it in my heart)
I am never without it (anywhere i go you go, me dear;
and whatever is done by only me is your doing, my darling)
I fear no fate (for you are my fate, my sweet)
I want no world (for beautiful you are my world, my true)
and it's you are whatever a moon has always meant
and whatever a sun will always sing is you
Here is the deepest secret nobody knows
(here is the root of the root and the bud of the bud
and the sky of the sky of a tree called life;
which grows higher than the soul can hope or mind can hide)
and this is the wonder that's keeping the stars apart
I carry your heart (I carry it in my heart)"
No comments:
Post a Comment